I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
PS SASH were terrific with Molly, too.
Dear Nagi,
I have only just seen this post. I lost my beloved 14 year old Kelpie last year. My heart goes out to you. I suspect there’ll be a big hole in your lift for a while: routine, companionships and being ambushed by unexpected memories. My Molly was a natural gourmet, too! I was trained in commercial cookery so it was a special trait.
All the best.
I’m so sorry about Dozer.
He brightened my day in ways I will never forget, I loved the letter to him he will be missed
Xxxx,
Ella
Anyone who has had a dog or lost a dog knows how much love and devotion pours from them. He had a wonderful life and we enjoyed the stories and the photos. That pancake pic! Wishing you much happiness and a little easing of the grief. You were the perfect mom/friend to Dozer.
I am reading this with tears streaming. I have followed you and dozer for several years now. I was worried about you when I noticed Dozer showing his age a bit.
I hope you will soon find a new puppy to help fill that void. He or she won’t fill Dozers shoes but will help your heart heal. My deepest sympathy. Our fur babies are our family❤️❤️❤️
Agreed
I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved friend.
I was so sad to hear of Dozer’s passing. He’s been in my household and part of my journey learning to cook as I navigated your recipes. Thank you for sharing him with us! Wrapping you with love and strength dear Nagi. RIP sweet Dozer xox
Hello Nagi,
My heart goes out to you and Dozer. I came to your site today for another lovely recipe and was so excited to see his latest update! Seeing his goofy smile always made my day! My family recently had to say goodbye to the family cat, a sassy tuxedo named Bubbles. The name was fitting, as he was an air head with a big heart. He blessed our lives for whole 16 years, I wish it was more! These little furry guys come into our homes and our hearts, leaving paw prints all over both. I still find his black fur on my clothes and cry. My heart goes out to you. I know they eagerly waiting for both of us on the other side of the rainbow bridge. Big hugs.
I am so sorry, what a wonderful life Dozer had. It’s so hard when they go.
I am so, so sorry for your loss.
All our love to you and Dozer. He is somewhere in the Stars.
Joelle and her very best friend Pook.
I’m not crying, honestly. Hugging my 10 year old and 9 month old goldies extra today.
Yimmie, the puppy, loves to help out in the kitchen, making sure the floor is clean. Maybe she’ll turn out to be another Dozer
Dear Nagi,
I am deeply sorry for your lost of your furbaby.One thing I know is that Dozer is watching you in heaven and waiting until he can get to see you again.I know that he will come looking for you as you were the best mama Dozer could ever have.Just remember that he could have picked anyone but he picked you you and knew you were the right one.He is one friend we will never forget Rest in Peace Dozer🐾
Deep condolences-Thrisha
Dear Nagi, I was so sorry to hear about Dozer. I looked forward to his adventures as much as your recipes! He was such a happy, wonderful life long companion and you two had an incredible bond but from love! Take care,
Dear Nagi, I was so sorry to hear about Dozer. I looked forward to his adventures as much as your recipes! He was such a happy, wonderful life long companion and you two had an incredible bond but from love! Take care,
Oh my, I feel your loss. We had a yellow Lab Retriever that was our boy and at 13 yrs of age, we had to let him go. It’s been just over 10 years and I still think of him every day. We were so blessed to have him our lives, as were you with Dozer. I have your cookbook on a stand in my kitchen and every day, I see your smiling face and it makes me smile. You will never be able to replace Dozer but you will find another dog to fill the void he has left in your heart.
Dear Nagi,
I was very sad to hear of Dozer’s passing. I have had 4 precious Golden Retrievers in my lifetime and it is so hard to let them go.
Your animals never truly leave you. They just go to rest and rejuvenate until you invite them back into your heart again. You were the best Mother Dozer could ever have had. Look for him in the future. If he is coming back you will find him. After all, He is You!
Love, Terri and CoCo
Hi Nagi
Sorry for you loss , You and your fury babies had some magical times spent together, sending you love and hugs .
RGDS
Jessie
Oh my dear Nagi, I’m holding your tender heart in mine; I’ve just found out that Dozer has passed through the sacred threshold in his journey onto other adventures. Yesterday I decided it was time to bring a new animal into my life after two years with no pets. But then I read today of Dozer’s passing and of your pain and I thought I don’t think I could go through the loss of another animal again. But as I read of Dozer’s adventures, his personality and charms, it reminded me of the joy and simple delight an animal can bring to life and it confirmed that I am ready again. Thank you for allowing me to be part of Dozer’s life; it was always a wonderful treat to read at the end of the many many recipes of yours that I’ve made over the years. Grief can be a long and winding journey but may you find comfort knowing that thousands of your fans are holding love in their hearts for you.
So well said and written. I hope you have another fur baby in your life soon.
Thanks Beverley. Yes have recently becomere the servants of a little boy Burmilla who has brought joy, love and laughter into our hearts and home.
I lost my 2 fur babies recently, first in December 25 then the other in February 26 less than 10 weeks apart. They were 14 too and they too struggled to the end to stay with me. I feel every scrap of your pain and completely dissolved into floods of tears reading your letter, I too had things to say but was sobbing too hard to say them. They say time heals and I hope, for both of us, that is true.