I held his paw and slept by his side for 14 days in hospital. But it turned out, all the love in the world wasn’t enough to save him. Thus begins the final post on Life of Dozer.
My dearest Dozer,
You came into my life in my arms, holding you protectively. And after almost 14 years together, I held you in my arms protectively again as I said goodbye.
I was sobbing so hard, I forgot everything I wanted to say to you in our final moments together.
So I started writing this letter to you, to say all those things.
I wanted to reminisce about our wonderful times – the thousands of visits to the dog beach, all the wonderful food we sampled together, the cuddles, the neck-scratching-sessions, our road trips.
I wanted to thank you for spreading the joy that is you with readers all around the world, for happily coming along with me to meet readers at events, book signings, fund raisers, lunches, dinners, not to mention TV shows, photo shoots, and my gosh, we can’t forget our stint on Play School!
But as I sit here, typing away with tears streaming down my face, I realise that’s not what I want to say to you.
What I want to say is thank you.
Thank you for giving me your whole heart.
Thank you for giving me your unconditional loyalty.
Thank you for loving me just as I am, for all my flaws, for never caring what I weigh, what I wear, what I look like.
Thank you for always being there, my one constant through the good and bad times.
Thank you for making me smile, even on the hardest of days.
And thank you for trying so hard to stay with me as long as you could, fighting to heal until your very last day. I will never forget how deep you had to dig to find the strength for your rehab walk on our final morning together.
I know that one day, I will be able to look at photos of you again without sobbing. And I know all this pain I am feeling is because I loved you so fiercely and completely, and I wouldn’t trade it for a second I got to spend with you.
But right now, four days after saying goodbye, it feels like the heartbreak will never heal, like I will never smile again.
Rest in peace, my darling Dozer. I will never forget you, and I will never stop loving you.
Love,
Your mum xoxo
Thank you SASH
To the vets and nurses at the Small Animal Specialist Hospital (SASH),
Thank you for the extraordinary care, skill, and kindness you showed Dozer. Every moment, from the medical expertise to the gentle reassurance and cheering him on, meant more to me than I can say. Knowing he was in such capable, compassionate hands gave me comfort during the hardest days. I will always be deeply grateful for everything you did for my beautiful boy. – Nagi x
I’m so very sorry for your loss, Nagi. I’ve followed your blog for a while now & always look forward to seeing pics of your sweet boy. May your memories of him forever comfort you.
You two are blessed to have one another! I’m crying with you. Dozer is no longer in physical pain although it will take some time for you. Hang in there. Remember all the blessings that Dozer brought into your life so those tears are good tears. Sending virtual hugsss to you!
Thank you for writing and sharing your deeply felt tribute to Dozer. He was blessed to be part of your life, just as you were immeasurably enriched to share yours with him. Blessings from Idaho and prayers for this time of grieving to pass kindly.
I am so sorry Nagi
You are a generous soul and Dozer was sent from Heaven to join you
The love you shared with your faithful loyal companion produces more oxytocin than any other bond
But the price of love is grief as the Queen said
Dozer is released from his suffering
And is with you in spirit from his Heavenly realm
Go quietly until your heart begins to heal
Janet
Nagi, I’m so saddened to read of the loss of your Dozer. You were the best Mum to your sweet boy.
You were blessed to have him in your life. May Dozer RIP 🙏🏻💕
The pain of them leaving is so fierce it makes it difficult to breathe, but the gift they gives us again and again means over time when the pain starts to dim, the love and memories they left in our hearts becomes even more dear and can lift us up for the rest of our lives!
I am so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing spectacular Dozer with us. I just lost my 19 year old special kitty and the pain is real.
I so loved your segments about Dozer – I had a Golden, Abby for 8 years and then she couldn’t walk one morning…Nagi, I will pray that your heart will heal over time.
Dear Nagi, So sorry for the loss of your beautiful boy. You provided Dozer with a wonderful life and gave us a glimpse into it as well. I loved the beach photos of him playing with his buds and his kitchen supervision when you were cooking! Sending you strength, resilience, and know that you will meet again. The affection we share with our beloved dogs is a sacred communion that will never be broken. That love will last forever. Take good care. xoxo
Nagi, my heart breaks for you. I’m so sorry for your loss. Dozer was such a beautiful boy. RIP Dozer and say hello to Wanda over the bridge 🙁
Dear Nagi, nothing can replace the love of a dog. My heart is broken for you. Stay strong and know that the grief will ease in time. All the wonderful memories you have will give you comfort. Such a beautiful dog was Dozer and although I never met him his love for you shone through all the photos and posts. He will be so missed. Kia Kaha and aroha from New Zealand.
I am crying with you 😢
Love
Quebec
Dear Nagi, my heart breaks for you and the tremendous loss of your beloved Dozer. I like many others are crying alongside you. I dread the day I will experience the same pain when our dog dies.
Sending you love from Texas, Nagi.
Rest easy Dozer.
Nagi, words can’t really express what you must be feeling right now. I know from experience it never gets any easier. Just try to take each day at a time, consoling yourself that he had the best life possible, he knew he was loved and adored by you and the RTE/RTM team and in return he brought and gave so much to all of you. Having been using your website for more years than I care to remember I remember fondly his antics when he was younger and will miss your Dozer posts. Thinking of you all. Take care.
So, so sad to say goodbye.
My heart and love are with you.
Dozer will be waiting for you, as all dogs go to heaven (it wouldnt be heaven with out them).
I am so sorry you lost your best friend Someday the good memories will push the pain down, but it will stay with you. I lost my girl 30 years ago and I just bawled like a baby reading your post. but I am so glad I had her for 14 years sending you love and healing
I’ll miss seeing the two of you so happy together. You’ll give your heart away again, Nagi, after it mends a little. I’ll think of you during this very tough time, just how tough all pet owners know.
With love, Constance
I am so sorry to hear of Dozer’s passing but I understand your pain. I lost my Keira on January 11 and she was a month younger than Dozer.
For many years, I have looked forward to your emails not just for your excellent recipes, but to follow Dozer and his escapades. Our Golden retrievers are a very special breed and loyal to a fault. Dozer had a wonderful personality, and it was obvious to everyone how much he loved and adored you. Again, know how sorry all of your readers are and we shed tears for Dozer right along with you.
Dozer, you were blessed with the best mum in the world! Food, the language of love that she shared with you and the delicious recipes she has introduced us all to, have filled our hearts and tummies with so much joy. You will be hugely missed Dozer, rest in peace. ❤️